Marks and other Jazz to worry about.

Hey there

It's pretty much official now, this blog right here will feature professional wrestling only. Simple as. Perhaps, some other subjects such as my favorite Russian band will get an honorable mention.

Let's begin this rant, shall we?

I shouldn't call it a rant to be honest. After all, I'm just trying to shed some light on what I perceive is the current ideology and that jazz of the wrestling business. Actually, "idiocy" would be a better word.

Also, I'm going to focus on World Wrestling Entertainment alone, since they provide the most cock-ups I can put into this blog.

It started off great last thursday. I log on to the internet and I read that Scotty Goldman got fired.

BIG DEAL, you might think. Many of you don't even know who the fuck Scotty Goldman is.

Well, Scotty Goldman was a "rookie" WWE Superstar who didn't do much other than present his own WWE.com exclusive show "What's Crackin' with Scotty Goldman". Last week, the show was renamed "Good as Goldman" where he humorously tried to elaborate on his points. The show was well received, judging from the comments on Scotty's official myspace. (no link provided, don't fool yourself)

For the rest, Scotty Goldman was pretty much not used. He got fired. Logical decision if creative comes up with the reasoning of "not having anything for him creatively".

DO YOUR FUCKING JOB!

Scotty Goldman was known on the independent scene as Colt Cabana. Aside from being the best friend of top RAW Star CM Punk, he was the one guy many fans, promotors and peers felt the term "WWE STAR" was invented for. They were all right. Colt Cabana has the microphone skills (excellent humour) and is a well trained wrestler.

WWE officials, and most of all Vince McMahon, didn't feel he had that "TV-star look" which basically meant he was as generic as could be.

WRONG!

Well, actually, they were right, but WWE made the mistake of crafting a gimmick for Colt that only showed a little bit of Colt's capabilities: funny one liners.

If they had left Colt the way he was on the indies and turned that into his WWE gimmick, things would've gone into a different direction. Believe me.

One match he had comes to mind. It was CM Punk's official farewell match from Ring of Honor before he was headed to WWE. Given Punk and Colt's history together as up and comers, tag team partners (as the Second City Saints) and opponents, ROH officials booked Punk's last match against Colt Cabana.

It was a 2-out-of-3-falls match. The way Colt behaved was absolutely tremendous. A funny antic was for example:

Colt stops Punk into a stalemate and then asks him to look up. Punk looks up and Colt hits him. A while later, Colt once again stops him and asks him to look up. Punk doesn't do it at first but finally gives in and does so. Colt hits him again.

Later, Colt stops Punk for the third time and asks him to look up. Punk doesn't do it. Colt begs, but Punk doesn't give in. Colt then asks Punk to look down, which he does. Colt then stomps on his foot."

Those in ring antics is what makes a crowd pop for a wrestler/superstar. Those things "get you over"

WWE naturally failed to see this and as such, misses to see the potential of the man. It's their loss. I'm sure officials will regret the decision later and rehire him as soon as they do.

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On to the main idea of this blawg.

Regularly, I visit the official WWE Universe website (formerly known as WWE Fan Nation). What surprised me is that there are quite smart WWE fans who know just as much as any smart mark (whoah, there's that term) but most of the time, the reactions of fans are just right down funny.

Marks. Marks. What are "marks"?

Marks are fans of the professional wrestling product that have no clue. They think whatever happens in the wrestling world - rivalries, heel persona's and whatnot - are real.

That's why a face gets cheered like crazy and a heel gets showered with boo's. Those folks know no better.

Marks are considered the lowest form of fans, at least by most of the Smart Marks (or smarks for short). Smart Marks consider themselves an elite group of fans (or most of them do anyways) because they have insider info they picked up from the so called "dirtsheets" provided by insiders or people with contacts within the business. They generally know what the wrestling business is about and simply watch to see how all of those storylines play out.

They are also the kind of fans who more or less rebel against current storylines. Basically, if the face is a bad wrestler, they boo the face. If the heel is an awesome wrestler, they cheer.

I consider myself to be a part of the Smart Mark group. I read dirt sheets multiple times a day and when I attended the live event in Brussels last november, I think I was the only one cheering for John Morrison, The Miz, Vladimir Kozlov. The arena went berserk when the Hardy's came out, while I was boo'ing my lungs out because both Hardy brothers suck balls. Yes, Matt is a decent wrestler, but boring as fuck. Jeff is a waste of space who relies only on high spots and if things went normal, should have OD'd by now.

Triple H is another kind of guy. He gets cheered at this point, because he's a face. I cheer him on as well, because Triple H is a great worker. However, I fucking hate him. This is difficult to explain. Triple H, the character, is whom I like. The man who portrays Triple H on tv (are you following?) is the one I don't like. Paul Levesque is his name. He is Triple H, but he's an asshole.

Why? He's the one that bangs Stephanie McMahon, daughter of Vince, and thus "the boss' daughter". Because of his marriage to Steph, he has an incredible amount of "pull" backstage and basically can put himself over anyone else on the roster. If he wants a title reign, he'll make Stephanie pregnant again and he's got one. So far, he's accumulated 13 world title reigns.

However, he doesn't mind throwing the title up for grabs for the next prolific star who might do well with a world title run. It just takes a few months where the next star is buried and Triple H is perceived as the toughest fuck in this world (which marks of course believe) before the next star wins the title in a fluke.

That's how it goes with Trips.

Luckily, I managed to surround myself on forums with smart fans who enjoy the product as much as I do, but generally complain about it after every show. I'm not alone like that.

As for something else, in closure.

Lera Kozlova, "ex-Ranetka", has had her first solo gig in the city of Samara. I've seen snippets and aside from looking incredibly beautiful, she was into it like fire. I miss her presence in Ranetki. I really do. The new girl isn't as well trained vocally or percussionistically (I made that word up) but she gets the job done with help from the band and the manager. I also realised (after closer inspection of pictures) that she didn't get a "boob job" but just grew up nicely. Wonder why I closely inspect pictures? You just had your answer HAH!

I'm seriously hoping she returns at some point, even only to do vocals, while the new girl (Anya "Nyuta" Baydavletova - there's a moutful) plays the drums. Dream scenario, naturally. I guess that's gonna be one for the "Yeah Right"- category along with my "I'm gonna be a professional wrestler" -dream.

fuck it. As usual. Bai.

Delirious.

FACTOIDS:

I am addicted to Russian pop music

I always look for reasons why the hell WWE screws up so many things

I marked out for Triple H at the Brussels show nevertheless.

I use alot of limey green colors in this blog post.

If you ever decide to speak to me in person, I will not be able to hear you over the sound of my awesomeness. I'm sorry in advance.