I figured I'd write something that would brighten your day. Another blog.
First some shout-outs: Hey ER.
There.
Right, people who have endured me on forums know that I'm rather addicted to music, usually of the metallic kind, which is likely to be heavy (if you lost me, it's Heavy Metal)
The music scene today is remarkable. You got a boatload of new and upcoming artists spewing the most uninspired crap. Not surprisingly, it's usually an assortment of beats, with total disregard for flow or anything. It lacks soul, passion, etc. The only thing it has more than great musicians is a marketing machine backing them up. Like Disney.
Disney has brought us much joy in our childhood. In our adolescence, they've brought us pain and misery. Personification of this all: The Jonas Brothers.
Apparently, more and more people share my view on this band. I happened to come across a "motivational" that pictured the Jonas brothers with the following subscript:
"SO FAR IN THE CLOSET, they're having adventures in Narnia". I loved it. Narnia is another one of those big money makers, but I'll let that one slide.
Seriously, these Jonas brothers are breaking hearts and record sales everywhere. Little girls drop into a coma and wake up moments later by their heartbreaking tunes that touch everyone so deeply. Since sarcasm doesn't translate well on the internet, let me say that was a textbook example.
You can write love songs every so often, or songs with absolutely no meaning. But to fill several albums with the same old formula? It's a feast of recognition, but the ladies love it, because that's what they know. For me personally, when it comes to music, I prefer browsing through specialised music magazines for reviews. I look at the genre, and then download ... ahem ... buy the album. Sometimes they suck, mostly, they don't.
Either way, I'd rather go for Hannawwwh Montanawww because Miley Cyrus will stop being jailbait in 2 years. Won't say the music is worth a dime, but at least she's nice to look at. As long as she keeps her mouth shut. I've watched her show a few times, and I swear that once I close my eyes when she's talking, images of Huckleberry Finn and Tom Sawyer cross my mind.
Milk Inc is another example. Dunno if anyone outside of Belgium has heard this mismatch made in hell. Let me give you the jist of it. They've been making the same songs for ten years, rehashing lyrics in a different order, rearranging a few notes here and there. They've been killing concert halls entirely and last Werchter was programmed as headliner against the legendary Metallica. I saw this as an act of disrespect towards Metallica. The guy (he looks like a horse) doesn't even play live, or he's some sort of magician. If he did play live, he'd be the only guy able to play "music", hold his hands in the air, asking the crowd over and over again to do the same.
Kate Ryan is a little more popular outside the Flemish region. But she's probably even worse. Okay, I take that back, they're equally worse. It's a well known fact that this woman can only get hits, once she's raped a cover of a prolific artist (Mylene Farmer, Desireless; do you know 'em? no, that's because they are good artists). It doesn't stop there. Besides being ugly, she fails at being stylish, and is arrogant at the same time. Winners combo.
I may sound like a disgruntled musician who has never been able to make it in the business. Let me burst that bubble. I'm not a musician, I never wanted to make it in the music business. I'll hand you "disgruntled". Enduring a top countdown is like having to read twilight while listening to Lady Gaga's CD on shuffle and repeat.
Oh yeah, Lady Gaga. Whether she's a hermaphrodite, doesn't matter. If she can impregnate herself, good for her. That pokerface song made me cringe and even radiohosts were petitioning to get it off the #1 spot. It was a ridiculously bad song. The next song was equally bad (I'm not gonna elaborate on "disco sticks", whatever that may be.) but I like "certain snippets" of Paparazzi. It's not half bad. I won't consider myself a fan of her/him either way (I still have a little sense of pride left).
I'm thankful that there are still artists who have sold out to the masses but can maintain their integrity and make the music they like. Metallica is one of them. Rammstein is another. There's no doubt in my mind that these are my favorite bands. Metallica made a semi-thrash record and Rammstein made one song that was a subtle, but huge 'FUCK YOU' to the mainstream mass. Especially with the videoclip. It was a necessity after they fell off the underground-wagon with "Reise Reise" (which was rather good) to "Rosenrot" (which was quite horrible). Recently heard "Pussy" and "Rammlied" and faith was somewhat restored.
Maybe there is a future for inspiring, soulful music where you can notice an artist has poured blood, sweat, tears and other bodily fluids (in some cases) into a song you'll love to love. I can only hope.
~ Deli
PS: Rachael Lillis is an ILF. Because she's not a mother, that makes her lose that M. Hell, she's like 31. wowzers.
PPS: I'll use different colors for each blog. Just to annoy you.
/needlessrant
